We accept or reject everything in our lives based upon our present level of awareness of reality and what is actually true. Think about this for a moment. Any problem you now have could have been avoided had you been more aware at a defining moment.
We make all of our decisions based upon our own level of awareness. In other words people do the best with what they have, even if they make bad decisions they aren’t bad, they just have different levels of awareness in life.
People have asked me what exactly coaching is and why does it work? I believe that coaching is the process of helping an individual become more aware of their reality than they currently are. This is usually done by asking people the right questions because just giving someone a solution before their level of awareness has increased won’t solve their problem. This is also why it takes more than one session with someone to help them. It is not filled with “this is what you need to do” information but rather helping someone to first become aware of what they need so that they can solve their own issue. It is 99% of the time just a different level of understanding that brings breakthrough.
Sure I will sometimes offer strategy but only if someone is ready for that, they must come to the conclusion that is what they need before it is provided.
I had someone come to me and say they needed money now, they were broke and wanted to start a business. For this person, their level of awareness was limited to “businesses make money”, but they did not understand there is a large investment up front, it takes time and it’s not something you do if you have no money to start.
By asking them the right questions they were able to understand the better choice would be to find a job and build a business over time.
Another person might come to me and say they lack motivation. But the reality is that they are motivated about what is a priority to them. So the issue is not that they are not motivated it is because their awareness for what they want has not yet been realized. Or they are trying to get motivated to do something they don’t really care about.
Ponder this for a moment, you won’t do something unless you have a deep down engrained motivation to do so. And in addition to this if you have a bad habit you are trying to get rid of you will fail until you become aware of what need you are meeting. You may be meeting it with a bad habit, but nonetheless that need is crying out. So to break the bad habit then is to become more aware of your needs and meet them with a better choice. But the reason so many cannot break their bad habits is they don’t take the time to become more aware.
Growth in life is all about awareness. We even connect to others based upon our own level of awareness about that individual. So many times we can make judgments about others, come to wrong conclusions, reflect our own insecurities upon them, or get jealous. But if we had greater awareness about that individual misunderstandings begin to disappear. This is because we become more aware of who that other person really is. It will either confirm who they are or show us we misjudged. The fact is when we believe something false we will look for "facts" to prove our belief. Even if those "facts" are false we adopt them because it proves our belief. So we need to be able to break out of the limited awareness in order to identify the things we believe that are untrue.
I think that the people that have the hardest time feeling secure in their lives are those that try to focus only on themselves. They never want to talk about others lives or what is important to them. They share about themselves nonstop which makes them feel connected in some way, but they will never reach a level of security they could have based upon greater understanding of those around them.
So this is what coaching really offers, it offers the ability to fast track your awareness so that you can make better decisions, experience breakthrough and transform your life. I don’t know about you, but that to me is one of the most wonderful feelings in life, when suddenly you understand something you never did before. And I am truly grateful I get to be part of that process in so many people’s lives and I hope that if you are reading this I get to be part of your process as well.
I hope this answers this age old question...well is it really age old? I don't know, but it seems to be asked a lot. So that is my final answer. :)